Inside the Little Plastic Castle

This is a big subject, and I think you've received excellent answers in the comments. However, I'd like to add that it's really important to give yourself permission to stop seeing a therapist, even if they initially tick a lot of your boxes. I kept seeing someone who was not a good fit for me because she was trauma-informed and answered a lot of my initial question in a good way -- it's important to vibe with someone, probably even more important than if they answer your questions well. My most recent successful therapist didn't know anything about autism, but was willing to learn and work with me, which turned out to be more important to me than if she'd already known, but didn't fit well with me.